I had no idea how to welcome a baby into our family or how to be ready to be a mother during my first pregnancy, let alone what to put on the register that I was constantly being asked about. I then went online. I had what I considered to be an A+ new-mom registry after reading every bouncer seat review online and carefully weighing the benefits and drawbacks of bassinettes.
The pacifiers were accepted by dentists. The best bottle warmer available. the swaddle that countless mothers vouch for. More baby-related items swayed, jiggled, and wiggled than I would like to admit. The emblem, of course: a brand-new rocking chair.
After that, I didn’t utilize any of it since I had my kid. She refused to move, jiggle, or bounce; I never understood that. The average American family spends $14,000 on their child in the first year after birth, and most mothers, according to BabyCenter, create multiple registries. On average, a registry contains over 120 items for the baby—but frequently not a single gift for the mother.
I discovered there were many items I genuinely needed after giving birth, but none of them were on my registry, the blogs, or the must-have lists, when I was spending the first few days and weeks at home with my baby.
To help my body—and my stitches—heal, I needed supplies and support from another person.
I faced a number of problems after giving birth that no one had anticipated for an entire year, including hormone shifts, hair loss, and skin changes. A lactation consultant to take a look at my unsuccessful latch and help me fix it, and to reassure me that what I was experiencing was normal as I iced my extremely engorged breasts.
Someone to come cook me a nourishing meal and hold my baby for 2 hours so I could sleep.
Nutrients and nutrition to heal from major surgery and support my body as it produced breastmilk.
Answers to all the questions I had no one to ask.
I wanted to take care of my body, but it felt like I didn’t have time to care for myself and my baby, so my own health became my last priority. I needed somebody to help clean the damn bottles, burp cloths, and sheets, but mostly I needed rest and the tools to help navigate the enormous emotional shifts that had me questioning who I was daily, and wondering how I got there and if I would be a good mother.